last day in orphanage....

Yeah.... this is Jasmine's last day in the orphanage. She is not happy for the first few minutes she sees me, but each time her reaction gets better and better. She smiled much more today, allowed me to give her a bananna for the very first time, and played really well.... until one of the nannies came in.... which is always when things go south. I gave the orphanage director Jasmine's little dress and shoes for tomorrow because she will bring her for the ceremony.

Earlier in the morning, my in country facilitator's cousin (Thao) took me shopping. It was much faster having her around to talk for me and show me the correct place to buy things such as a Vietnamese child's CD, and other gifts for Jasmine such as a Vietnamese flag. She is a language student at the local university and I really couldn't understand very much that she said. I guess that Vietnamese women hold hands when they are walking down the street... which we did:) That was a little different for me:) especially when the sidewalks are not that wide and there are usually motorbikes everywhere. She took me to the Central Market in Hoi An which is the ancient city where I am staying. The city was relatively untouched by the Vietnam war. Here are some photos.

meeting with Grandfather...

Yesterday afternoon, I had the opportunity to meet with Jasmine Tam's grandfather. It was a very emotional experience, but I learned much about the circumstances of her birth so I will be able to tell her when she grows up. Her grandfather is a rice farmer who also fought and lost an eye in the Vietnam war. His land is owned by the government since this is a Communist country, and his crops are frequently destroyed by flooding, storms and typhoons. The worst typhoon occurred in the history of Vietnam in 2006 right when Jasmine was being born. When she was born, he had to collect scrap metal and sell it just to buy milk for her. I told him I would bring her back in 5-6 years so he could see her again, and he was very happy about that.
I am very grateful I had rare opportunity to meet and interview a relative.

Here is a photo of Jasmine and her grandfather. Later she had a bath.... which I was privy to taking photos:)

Today is my last day in Hoi An. I have to move to another hotel for one night because this hotel is booked up tonight. As I have mentioned before, I am having to stay here an extra day due to someone's "meeting". Next, we will go to Tam Ky for the Giving and Receiving Ceremony, and will stay there 5-7 days waiting for the passport and Visa.

Birthday Party.....

This morning, most of the kids went to an outdoor restaurant type of place for a "birthday party". Apparently, they occasionally have a party for whomever's birthday it was for the past month or two. It was pretty chaotic. There were animals around for the kids to look at. Jasmine was infatuated by the Koi and other fish, as well as the geese and birds, but she was very afraid of two dogs that were tied up nearby. I am not sure how she is going to do with my dog, Spirit. She seems to be getting a bit more attached to me, especially when the nannies are not around.... like today. She was leading me around the place showing me the pond, and the fish and flowers. She still refuses to take food from me, but did let me peel a bananna for her. She refused to eat any of the food at the party, but when they brought out the banannas, she ate almost two whole ones.... for such a little tummy, that was alot. All of the other kids ate like crazy. At the orphanage they are fed the same thing three times a day... cold rice, with a couple of little vegetables on top with maybe a little piece of meat or tofu.... so this party was a huge treat for them. I think they did it partially for my benefit and partially since I just paid them my cash "gift", so they had some extra. They call everything around here a "gift", when it is a required fee. It's ok.... I was glad to do it. I will get to pay many more "gifts" in the next couple of days that I am just learning about .
Here are some photos from today.

I got lost today:)

This morning I wanted to do bunch of shopping before going back to the orphanage for the day. I walked pretty much everywhere in the entire city, but couldn't find my hotel:) It was kind of fun until the blisters started forming on my feet. I purchased two little aoi dai's.. the traditional Vietnamese dress,... some lacquer art, and some gifts to give to Jasmine each year on her adoption day. I have quite a few more things to buy. I finally ended up flagging down some guys riding motorcycles, which is everyone, and found one who could understand the word "orphanage" and I just paid him to take me there. I overloaded his motorcycle with all of my stuff.

Jasmine accepted me a little more today. She only cried for a few seconds instead of the entire time that I held her. I was kind of surprised at what I saw at the orphanage on a weekend day. All of the smaller kids were in the one bedroom with a few nannies. They had no toys or stimulation. They just lay around and sleep all day long. The older 5-6 year olds had no supervision at all. All of the doors to the play room, dining room and offices were all locked. When I walked her past the play room she started to cry and tried to pull me that way... but I showed her that the doors were locked. I don't think she understood.
Later I ran into one of the volunteers who said that it was like that every day of the week until the organization she volunteers for had purchased and donated the toys and started the play room. They had absolutely no stimulation whatsoever. Not even a radio or music. She said that Jasmine is much more subdued on Mondays because of the lack of stimulation over the weekend, then by Friday she is more lively and smiling. I didn't get her to smile at all today.
I believe this is probably the reason that she does not yet speak. She has not even reached the babbling stage yet. I was told that an Australian speech therapist evaluated her last week and said that she is at the 3-6 month level in her speech development. We have some work to do, for sure. They recommended a sign language program.

Tomorrow morning we are going to a birthday party which is held every month or two for the children who's birthday occurred
that month. Then I meet Jasmine's grandparents in the evening, which should be the most emotional, but hopefully helpful part of the trip. I hope to learn more about her mother and just be able to get pictures of them so that she can see them as she grows up.

I didn't take alot of photos today, but took tons of video.

We meet for the first time.... Day 1.

I finally met her today. It was kind of unceremonious.....One of the nannies just brought her out when I was speaking with the orphanage director. I got to see her for about 1 minute initially, then they took her back to the play room. As I was told , she is extremely timid. For the first part of the day, she wouldn't let me touch her without screaming, and finally by the end of the day, I was able to hold her for a few minutes, although her body was really stiff. Feeding her was out of the question. She would just turn her head away from me. Only the orphanage workers could feed her,... but we are only on day 1. She loves to draw and scribble. Every time she would draw something, she would give it to me:) She also loves to play the little plastic instruments. Here are some photos.

Nov 14th, 2008....

It's the morning of the 14th, and I will be meeting Tam (her Vietnamese name) today. It's hard to believe, after so many years, that it is finally happening... It's still the 13th at home, so I am still considering it my birthday. The most perfect birthday present:).
Even though the hotel was umm... I'll say, less than desirable, they did have a nice breakfast, and much healthier than our SAD of Cheerios, fried eggs and bacon... and we wonder why we are all sick. I am not sure what it was that I ate .... some noodles which were crunchy and some soft, a variety of vegetables and herbs mixed in, a quail egg (which is where I draw the line... I didn't eat it), and some kind of meat on top which I didn't eat either. There was some kind of soft gummy sweet molasses type of thing wrapped in a bananna leaf. I only took one bite of that because it was kind of like eating chewing gum. I wish I knew the names of these things. The Vietnamese people were laughing at me because I took a photo of the breakfast table and didn't really know how to use chop stix.
It's pouring down rain here, very humid, about 80 degrees right now at 7:30 AM. I took a photo from the front of the hotel which is overlooking a river. There are horns honking constantly with people busily going to work... I suppose.

An interesting 24 hours....

Just got to my hotel in Danang..... and fell asleep exhausted for a few hours. When I opened one of my suitcases, I found that all of my shoes had been stolen..... so, at least I have the one pair I was wearing:( That... on top of the fact that last week the windows were knocked out of my car at the gym, and my purse with ID and credit cards were stolen... had made me a bit untrusting of people. The reason I was stuck in Economy class in the middle seat all the way is that yes, it was a short notice, but I was also waiting for all of my new credit cards to come in. I won't go into any more of the negative stuff... other than just to vent my opinion that Vietnamese Airlines and the Vietnamese airport is THE most inefficient place I have ever been. Good thing I had a 3-4 hour layover in each city because it took that long just to do things ... like pay for extra baggage.....wait in several lines just to do one thing, then pay them extra for stealing my stuff. I think from what I have seen so far, Vietnam has a long way to go in being tourist friendly. Tomorrow can only be better.

I haven't seen anything of the city yet because it was almost dusk when I got here. Apparently Danang has alot to offer, but I leave early in the morning for Hoi An, about 45 minutes away, where the orphanage is. It is there where I will get to meet my daughter for the first time, only after meeting with the orphanage director, I am told. I am not being cynical when I say that I am sure that they will not let me see her until I pay more money.... I was told to prepare for another $1000.00 cash. This is how Vietnam works. I will never purposely enter into any business dealings with a Vietnamese person or the Vietnamese government again... although the end result tomorrow will be the culmination of a 2 year pregnancy and a very difficult labor:)

Here are a few photos, just from the Ho Chi Minh City airport so far. Tomorrow I will have more. I am so grateful I brought my computer.... I tried getting on the internet and my blog site from their computer. Everything was in Vietnamese.. so it was useless.